Student Perspectives: Overcoming Homesickness

Hi! I’m Violetta Fajardo, and I’m a Class of 2028 double major pursuing English and Journalism. While I currently live in Los Angeles to attend the University of Southern California, it’s not my hometown. Rather, my hometown is just over 2,000 miles away in Chicago, IL. Because I’m so far from home, I have experience with overcoming and working through feelings of homesickness that I wanted to share for those of you thinking about taking the next step of going to college. I’ll speak as if you’re a current student.

First, understand that your feelings are valid

No matter how far or short the distance to home is, it’s completely okay to feel homesick. Before starting at USC, I was over-the-moon, excited to explore and live in a new city while in college! Each day at USC was filled with a variety of fun welcome-week events and activities that kept me busy; it was everything I had wanted and expected. Yet, homesickness still crept up on me. It’s important to remember that feeling homesick is perfectly natural. Beginning a new chapter of your life away from home is a huge step forward in your early adulthood, and lots of big feelings are bound to come with it.

Get comfortable in your new environment

It’s easy to become intimidated by a new environment. This intimidation may lead us to hesitate when integrating ourselves within our new environments. However, the best thing to do is anything and everything: join clubs, attend campus events, talk to new faces! Even if home is five minutes away, I still suggest immersing yourself into campus life. By taking the jump, your new environment will start to look less foreign and more familiar. One of the biggest ways that I adjusted to campus was beginning an on-campus job as a Student Ambassador. Through my on-campus job, I met so many amazing people across a variety of majors and years. By involving myself with the campus, I began to build friendships that made USC feel like more of a community and home that I fit into.

Keep in contact

The best part about living in today’s modern, digital world is that no one is truly that far. What I mean by this is you can easily keep in touch with friends and family back home via texting or calling. “But I suck at texting/calling!” That’s okay; me too! Regardless, a text or call here or there can help maintain relationships that existed before college. Personally, I’m always sending TikTok videos to my best friend back home. Yes, I might not be saying a whole lot, but it shows I’m thinking of her. As for family, I call my parents once or twice a week. While that doesn’t seem like a lot, it’s because I know that once I get on the phone with them, I’ll be chatting for two to three hours at a time (so I really must be conscious of when I call). If I have a busy week and don’t have a lot of time to chat, I’ll send my parents a funny GIF as proof of life. Keeping in contact doesn’t have to mean constant calls or text streams. Whatever works best for you is what you should do. It’s even okay to come across like a desperate ex and send random “I miss you” texts to your friends and family (as long as you’re not actually texting your ex). Trust me, keeping in contact will make it seem like home isn’t really that far.

Do something meaningful

At the height of my homesickness, I had no idea what to do. It’s not exactly super easy to just book a flight home whenever I want. At the same time, I had been itching for another tattoo. So, what I did was sit down and think about what my new tattoo would be. Because I was homesick, I came up with a tattoo that connected me to my city and my family: the Chicago flag with the four six-point stars drawn by my parents and two siblings. Now, I’m not saying you have to go out and get a tattoo to help work through homesickness (please don’t get me fired). What I’m saying is that tattoos, for me personally, hold meaning and value. By getting a tattoo, I felt that I had a piece of my family and city with me forever—which made me feel closer to them. For you, doing something meaningful may be cooking a meal your parents always made or practicing a cultural/familial tradition in your new environment. Maybe it’s bringing your favorite stuffed animal with you or wearing a piece of jewelry that someone in your life gave you. You could even plan adventures with your friends/family way in advance so you have something to look forward to when you get home! Find what works best for you to feel closer to home.

Finally, remember why you chose a new environment

Though times may become tough, and maybe all you want to do is go home, it’s important to remember why you made the move in the first place—whatever that may be. It’s exciting to live in a new place and make new memories through new experiences! Not to mention, you’re learning in the classroom and the real world as well. Through these new experiences, you’ll learn so much about yourself and really grow as a person. Remind yourself that choosing to move was choosing to experience a once in a lifetime opportunity. You won’t be a young adult in college again, so it’s important to live in the moment and take advantage of it while you can.

All in all

Being the long distance daughter/sister/friend can feel wonderful and horrible at the same time. While I enjoy my new experiences and my life here in Los Angeles, there’s always a part of me that yearns for home. At times, it can feel like walking a tightrope between two places. I’ll admit that there are times that I regret not being able to hug my family on my birthday or being able to attend my brother’s performances. Yet, I think the regret of never having made the jump into something new (and constantly thinking “what if?”) would’ve killed me. Leaving one home for another and friends for friends may never get easier. But how amazing is it that I get to call two distinct cities home? And, how lucky am I to have a community and people who love me on both sides of the country? There’s no denying that it’s hard to leave home, but there are definitely ways to mitigate the yearning. I hope some of my tips can help you as you think about attending college . 😊